Stray Cats

Kitty Cat

There are a lot of stray cats in our neighborhood and most of them are feral so they don’t really come up to me.  People are always wanting to feed them and when you feed them they become tame but those people don’t take responsibility for them.

There was a black cat who Darrin wanted to feed and he told me to feed him so like a dummy I went to the grocery store and bought some cat food.  Then this orange one came along and he decided that we’re his new family.  I didn’t want to feed him because I figured if I didn’t feed him then he would go away and find someone else but he didn’t.

One morning I woke up and was going to go to the back yard to change his water and put more food in there and he was inside of our patio.  It’s an enclosed patio and at first I thought Darrin put him in there but when I asked him he didn’t know what I was talking about.

The next day I went out there and he was in the patio again.  I couldn’t understand how this Houdini was getting in.  Then it hit me, he is getting up on the roof of the garage and he finds his way to the screen that is supposed to be tacked onto the wood below the gutters and he jumps down onto the floor of the patio.

Now when I go out there to put him outside he doesn’t want to go.  I have to trick him with food to get him to leave but he knows my tricks lol.

I don’t want another cat!  I had a cat for 12 years, I feel like I did my time, why should I have to spend another, goodness knows how many years, having to clean another litter box?  The problem is, I have a very weak immune system, I can’t be scooping poop and breathing it every day.  I was always sick when we had our cat Shanaynay (rest in peace) and I vowed I would never go through that again and now I feel like it’s being forced on me.

I tacked the screen back on which wasn’t very difficult to do.  I watched the cat jump onto the patio roof in our back yard and jump onto the garage roof then saw where he was getting in.  There is a ladder leaning up against the wall where he gets in so he sort of climbs down to the top of the ladder then jumps to the ground.  It’s quite hilarious how he figure that out.  But, I don’t want the other cats to get the same idea so I had to tack it down again to close that off.

This cat has learned to live with staying in our back yard all the time.  I feed him in the morning and at night and he’s very happy.  When I take the dog out at night he is out there and wants to be petted.  He and the dog are friends now which is sweet because our dog used to try to chase cats when she saw them.

I told Chips case worker about the cat and the first thing she said was “stay away from the poppy” which I already knew.

I hope he finds a new home.  It’s not that I don’t want him because he is a very sweet cat, it’s just I can’t afford him and I am allergic to cats so I really shouldn’t have him around me.  I don’t regret the 12 years that we had our cat Shanaynay because I loved her to death but I won’t do it again.  I’m happy with just having a dog lol.

The Situation Roast Fail

Did anyone catch the roast of Donald Trump last night?  It repeated and I watched it 3 times.  It was just so funny that I couldn’t resist.

There were some very funny people and one not so funny person, the Situation.  I don’t know who wrote his jokes for him, that is if he didn’t write them himself, but assuming he wrote them I think he should have gotten some advice from a professional comedian to help him with his homework.  He didn’t do so good.

A couple of his jokes were funny but the rest was just tragic.  I really started to feel sorry for him.  If that were me I wouldn’t have kept going, I would’ve stopped and said “ok that’s my time, you’ve been great” then slunk back to my chair to sit quietly, or leave to go crawl under a rock for the rest of my life lol.  But he didn’t, he just kept going because he apparently thought he was funny enough to continue despite all the people who were booing him.

I don’t watch Jersey Shore so his jokes were lost on me and apparently nobody else who was there watch the show so maybe that’s why his jokes were lost on everyone.

His roast of Whitney Cummings was ok, poorly executed but ok but his roast of Anthony Jeselnik is where things went wrong.  He said that he was telling one of Anthony’s jokes to a super model while he was banging her with tons of money on the floor in his mansion.  Who says that?  Then he said he banged 5 or 6 more models.  That’s not even funny.  Was he trying to say that he’s a stud?  Because bragging like that just makes you look even more pathetic.

Well, despite this idiot, the roast was great.  Anthony Jeselnik was a great replacement for our friend Greg Giraldo who passed away last year (rest in peace).

Mike… keep your day job, whatever that might be.

Watch the clips of his suckfest then watch the funny clips on the Comedy Central website.