Writing My Book Isn’t Easy

On By Michel McDonaldIn Books, eBook, Friends and FamilyLeave a comment

I’ve mentioned in here before that I’m writing a book based on my childhood. It’s about the abuse that I took from being beaten with a fire log to being punched in the face at age 13. Also being homeless at 15 and 17.

Edit: It’s not just a few abuse stories but the abuse I took throughout my childhood.

Thinking about these 6 kids who committed suicide has really gotten me to think differently about my book because I too tried to commit suicide, not just because of the school bullies but also because of my parents who bullied me more than the kids at school.

I don’t want to compare what happened to me to what happened to them because I really don’t know what happened to them. Everyone’s story is like a finger print or a snow flake, no two are alike.

The problem that I’m facing though is, I’m not a writer. Yes I write blog posts from time to time but this is different.

I sent my life partner a chapter to read and after only reading 1 paragraph he told me that my sentence structure needs work. I reminded him that I am not a writer and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing lol. Then he said it was too long, I need to shorten some of the stories. It’s a book! I can’t shorten the stories because the only way to understand what happened is to read the long ass stories.

A friend of mine offered to edit it because she loves to read. She didn’t say anything about what was wrong with the chapter, in fact she just said it was good. She doesn’t edit books for a living but I trust her judgement because she loves to read.

I can’t afford to pay someone to edit my book, I can’t even pay a ghost writer to write it for me, all I can do is write and edit it the way I have been and hope that it is readable.

I’m not writing it to make big bucks, I’m writing it to get it all off my chest. I have family members who were cut out of my life until I was 27 years old when I finally met them who would like to know what happened during my childhood that they were not allowed to witness.

It will take some time for me to write because I really have to be in the mood and I haven’t been feeling much in the mood lately. Thinking about those kids who killed themselves has really put things in perspective for me and I start to think, do I really need to write this book? Was my life that bad? I mean, there are people who got it worse than I did, some so bad they actually killed themselves.

My abuse stories weren’t even that bad, I mean being punched in the face is nothing compared to one guy who said that he was cinderella, forced to do all the housework, beaten and left to starve in a dungeon like basement. I was treated like a prince compared to that guy.

Well, as I said, I’m not writing it to make money, more to give my friends and family to read. It will probably be offered for $1 on Barnes and Noble once I finish it. I have to set a price and as far as I know Pubit doesn’t let you give your book away.

Ok, I’m done venting lol.

Perez Hilton Pledges to Be Kind on the Ellen Show

On By Michel McDonaldIn CelebritiesLeave a comment

We were watching the Ellen show today and Perez Hilton was on there talking about how he is changing his ways. He talks about how he has been going out there speaking about the recent gay suicides and people were calling him out because he was one of the biggest internet bullies which makes him a hypocrite.

He talked about how he doesn’t want people in his own [gay] community being ashamed of him and I myself have been one of those who have been ashamed. Have you seen his website? He put semen and penis’ on people’s faces. Nobody deserves to have someone do that to them on a daily basis.

He also talked about outing people and I am glad he talked about that. It’s none of anyones business who is gay and who isn’t. I for one am always saying who I think might be gay or who I wish would just come out of the closet already but really, it’s none of my business either. Although my reasons for saying it aren’t malicious, it’s out of lust lol.

I have recognized myself that I might have said a few things here and there about people and I knew it was unfair and have either deleted the posts or have added a retraction saying it was wrong so I at least recognize my own internet bullying. I have owned up to it and apologized and now Perez has finally decided to do the same.

I’m glad that he has finally recognized what a selfish bully he became and is going to start doing things differently although it will remain to be seen if he actually does make those changes or not. I like Perez so I’m hoping he stays true to his word. He mentioned in the interview that he was 26 when he started and he’s 31 now. It’s time to start acting 31.

Unfortunately, The Ellen Show doesn’t allow embedding their YouTube video’s so you’ll just have to click below for the video.

Perez Hilton Pledges to Be Kind on The Ellen Show – via YouTube

My Bike Wheel

On By Michel McDonaldIn Cycling, ExerciseLeave a comment

It has been over a month since my back wheel decided it didn’t want me to ride my bike anymore. I was riding the store and all of a sudden it started getting wobbly but I dismissed it. By the time I left the store I had noticed that it was getting really bad so I got off the bike and saw the problem. The long screw holding the wheel onto the frame had unscrewed to the left. I don’t know why but it did and everything on the right side fell out. All the nuts are gone and the ball bearings, everything is missing.

Chips cousins girlfriend told me that her tenant fixes bikes but I didn’t know him and I would rather just go to the bike shop. Well, we never made time to go and my bike has been sitting in the patio all this time while I’ve had to walk to the store every day.

So yesterday I was walking by her house and went to the door and was talking to her and we decided to ask him about fixing the wheel and I brought the wheel to him and told him I would bring him the money to fix it. He said without looking at it that it might only cost $2-4 to fix it and I told him if it’s that cheap I will give you $20.

I brought him $20 this morning and he said whoa wait, don’t pay me until after I fixed it. Well, I didn’t want him to have to pay for the parts then I end up running out of money and not be able to pay him until November and I wanted my bike back sooner than later.

He took me to where my wheel was sitting and showed me something. I didn’t have my camera with me so I couldn’t take a picture but there is an internal problem. When I was riding the bike, or maybe when I had to walk it home, that long screw had started scraping on the inside of the wheel. So now there is a huge dent from that which will probably prevent him from being able to fix it at all.

He told me that if he can fix all that then he will but he doesn’t even know if he can so he gave me the $20 back and said if I can’t fix it you’re gonna have to go buy a new wheel.

If he can’t fix the wheel then that’s fine, I’ll just get it back from him because I don’t want to have to buy a new tire again, Darrin bought me the tire that is on that wheel and it matches my front tire lol.

I’m not in that much of a hurry to get it back BUT I would like to ride my bike to the store again you know? It’s faster when I’m in a hurry, especially late at night when they are closing in 15-20 minutes. Also, I’d like to get back on the bike to get my exercise again.

I’m Sorting Things Out Easier

On By Michel McDonaldIn Books, eBookLeave a comment

When I decided that I wanted to write a book about my life, I never thought it would be as difficult as it’s turning out to be. I thought I could just start typing my memories and the words would just come onto the screen. I never thought that my brain would confuse the sequence of events so much.

For example, when we lived in the trailer in 1985/86, we lived in several different places and for some odd reason I thought we were living with my parents friends Cindy and Ron then the trailer parks but I got it all wrong, it was the other way around.

So what I thought I would do to make it so much easier is to type out a list of all the stories that I have then go through the list one item at a time. Type out each story then print them out on 3×5 cards and put them in an organizer.

Yeah I know, my handwriting sucks

This way, when I have all the stories typed out I can sort the story cards in the correct sequence.  I also thought that I would store all the individual files on a USB memory stick and keep that inside this box so if my hard drive crashes I’ll still have all my files.

I’ve never written a book before and this is a system that I think will work for me. I don’t know if this is something other writers do but it’s what I’m going to do.

When I save the files I might just save them to html files. This way when I’m ready to create the epub file, I can just import all the html files then I won’t have to worry about copying and pasting anything. I can just sort the stories in Sigil according to their timeline after I have sorted the hard copies out.

Maybe it will be simpler than I thought it would be.

How to Lose Friends and Alienate People

On By Michel McDonaldIn MoviesLeave a comment

We went to the movies today and saw the movie How To Lose Friends & Alienate People.  First off let me just start by saying that my favourite actor now is Simon Pegg.  I loved him in Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz.

With that said I wasn’t as happy with this movie as I was with the others.  From the advertisements that I’ve seen I thought his character was going to be a lot more annoying than he was.  I thought it was going to be pissing people off left and right to the very end.  It was a good movie, it just wasn’t what I expected.

I do recommend this movie because it has Simon Pegg in it and he is a very good and funny actor and it was a good movie.

Unfortunately, it was in the tiny theater with the tiny screen and we were the only 2 watching it.  I guess it’s been there for a while or it didn’t get high sales so they pushed it to the little screen.

Political Pumpkins

On By Michel McDonaldIn HalloweenLeave a comment

Today we were at the doctor’s office and I was thinking I wonder if I can find a John McCain pumpkin pattern to carve.  Then maybe 20 minutes later Darrin asked if I could find a John McCain pumpkin pattern and I was like OMG I was just thinking about that today hehe.  So… I looked and found one.  He also wanted me to do this Hilary pumpkin for his friend from high school.

Beast Legends at 1am?

On By Michel McDonaldIn TVLeave a comment

Every Thursday night I turn to the SyFy channel to watch Destination Truth then Beast Legends.  For some odd reason Ghost Hunters is on instead.  Last week Ghost Hunters took Beast Legends time slot as well and I thought something was very strange about that but I didn’t investigate it until tonight.

I went to the Beast Legends page on the SyFy website and the first thing that I noticed was the time change on the image (above) that says 1am.

1am?  Really?  Did it get that bad of a rating that they had to change it to 1am?  I mean sure, the fictional characters they are looking for are far fetched from reality but you could say the same thing about Destination Truth as well.

I wasn’t too impressed with Beast Legends but I did watch it because I thought that the 3D graphics they were creating to build the beasts was kind of cool.  Then they had the little 1 or 2 minute movie at the end which only reminded me of an original SyFy movie lol.

If they are moving it to 1am permanently then I’m not even going to bother watching it anymore.  Yes I’m usually up at that time anyway but I’m not going to watch it if it’s so bad that they had to move it to 1am.  I’m loyal to some shows but not that one.

It’s too bad because the concept of the show was interesting.

Memories Are Like A Puzzle

On By Michel McDonaldIn Books, eBookLeave a comment

When I started writing my autobiography I thought it was going to be a breeze.  I just start typing and let the memories flow through and I would be finished in no time.  WRONG!

Having to remember what happened when so many things happened in a single year is like putting together a puzzle with pieces from 20 puzzles mixed together.  Before writing it out, I have to put down time lines on paper.  There are certain things that happened that are so wrong though.  I know they happened but how did they happen at all?

Example: I remember coming home drunk during my sisters birthday party in a specific apartment that we lived in.  I remember my bedroom was in a partitioned part of the living room and I remember plopping down on my bed drunk.  But, it’s impossible because during that time when my sister had that birthday party I wasn’t living with them anymore, I had been kicked out of the house.

That memory is impossible.  It couldn’t have happened during her birthday so I have to assume that it wasn’t her birthday but maybe a summer party instead.

I have to place the wrong puzzle piece in the wrong slot and hope that nobody notices that it’s wrong.  Does that make it fiction then if I make up what happened or is something I should just leave out entirely?  The problem is, it is an integral part of the story since I was 17 years old when it happened.  I’m trying to make a point about teenage alcohol abuse so I have to leave it in the story line.

Another example: I lived in so many different places in a few years but each memory seems like it took years to create but I now know that it was all during 1988-90.  The problem that I face is trying to figure out where I lived and worked and when.  If I watched tv during those times it would be so much easier to remember when I lived there because I could remember what happened in that season of the show.

I do remember living with my parents when the show Roseanne first aired and watching the series premiere with my mom and a few episodes after that but that was the only show I remember watching that was new.

Now I wish I had watched more tv when I was younger.  I wish I had carried a diary or made a resume.  At least if I had a resume I would know where I worked throughout my life, that way I could remember where I lived and what happened.  But nooo….

Oh well, I’m sure it will all come to me eventually.  It is not going to be easy to write this book and I know it’s going to take some time to do.

Self-Lacing Sneakers?

On By Michel McDonaldIn Gadgets, Movies, Products I LikeLeave a comment

Nike’s Plans For “Back To The Future” Self-Lacing Sneakers — via Deadspin.com

Remember the self-lacing shoes that Marty McFly put on in Back to the Future 2 when Doc Brown brought him into the future to save his son from getting arrested? He stepped out of the DeLorean and Doc handed him a jacket and shoes. He slipped the shoes on, pressed the button and they tightened around his feet.

This could be reality soon. Nike has filed a patent to make these shoes 5 years before it was destined to be reality along with the flying cars and no door handles on all houses. Here is a quote:

“The automatic lacing system provides a set of straps that can be automatically opened and closed to switch between a loosened and tightened position of the upper. The article further includes an automatic ankle cinching system that is configured to automatically adjust an ankle portion of the upper.”

And check out this video:

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROEZs0HpFQc&fmt=18

For clarification, the above video is NOT from Nike but a DIY video found on YouTube.  Nike would not sell shoes with a huge motor in the back lol.

Cool eh? Now if we can just get to work on those flying cars, door handles, tv screen windows,fax machines in every room including the closet and bathrooms, pizza hydraters, hovering wheelchairs, hover boards and everything else we will be set.

The Colorado Kid

On By Michel McDonaldIn Books, eBook, Nook, TVLeave a comment

I started watching the show Haven on Syfy when it began at the beginning of Summer mainly because according to the commercials it had some supernatural stuff happening. Anything supernatural is right up my alley.

The show is based on the Stephen King novel “The Colorado Kid” which made it even more exciting because anything that Stephen King writes is a success right?

I should have read the novel before the show came on the air just to get a feeling for what I can expect in the show but it never really occurred to me to do that. I finally did buy it this weekend and just finished reading it and I am even more confused about everything than I was before I read it.

In the book, Vince and Dave, who are the 2 brothers who work at the newspaper, are telling the story of the Colorado Kid to Stephanie, a 20-year-old intern, how he was found, how they found out who he was and everything else about his death from 1980.

According to the book, these “old” men are well into their 90′s and this was in 2005. Well, in Haven they are much younger, at least in their 70′s right? And the story of the Colorado Kid happened 25 years ago which would be 1985 not 1980.

I know the show Haven is only based on a book and that it’s “only a story” but when you are interested in a story, you have to know what’s going on to understand it. Even if it’s all make believe.

I was hoping this book would help me to understand Haven but it ended up confusing me more than I already was. I thought that the book was going to have all these strange occurrences that the show has but instead it’s just 2 men telling a story to a woman.

In Haven, there is a newspaper clipping of Lucy who is Audrey Parkers mother*. I don’t understand what that clipping has to do with the Colorado Kid considering they are looking up in the sky and the Colorado Kid was found dead by a trashcan. I tried looking for the newspaper clipping on the Haven page of the SyFy website but it’s not there. I tried doing a Google search but found nothing. I was hoping that I could get a closer look at the clipping to see what I needed to see to get the story but there’s nothing.

Apparently I was wrong about them looking up at the sky. They were indeed looking at “the Colorado Kid” but he’s not by a trash can in the picture in this article. In the book the 2 people who found him, the now Mayor of the town and his wife when they were teenagers, were not photographed looking at him. In the tv show Haven, it’s a woman and a little boy looking at him. Here is that clipping:

Image courtesy of Alastor from YouSayToo

I start to think of the Colorado kids wife and child but the wife was contacted a year after his death and flew to Maine from Colorado. The child however would have only been 2 years old considering he was 6 months old when his father went missing. This child is a bit older than 2 but the wife’s name wasn’t Lucy anyway (in the book).

I did a search in the book and it couldn’t find the word “Lucy” anywhere. I also did a search for the word “Haven” which came up with 3 but it was followed with a “‘t” which spells “haven’t.”

Oh, and what also confused me is that I thought this book was written in the 70′s or 80′s because the picture on the front cover of the book looks like an old picture. It’s supposed to be Stephanie, the 20-year-old intern right? Well, again, it looks like an older picture. Look at her hair and dress. Not something you’d expect to see an intern reporter to wear to work.

At any rate, I found the book to give me no answers but I still enjoyed reading it. I think that if a person wants to know more about Haven they are not going to find any answers in this book. The show is just an extension to the book, the book isn’t going to answer the questions about what’s going on in Haven.

* Update 2011-10-01: When I wrote this in 2010 I thought Lucy was Audrey Parkers mother but at the end of the 2nd season we all find out that Lucy and Audrey Parker are the same person.  Mind blowing.