Legitimate Facebook Friend Request

facebook friend request

As of today, I will no longer be accepting friend requests from people on Facebook.  It seems that every time someone sends me a friend request, they either never talk to me, or they won’t leave me alone because the only reason they sent the request was because they want to have sex with me.  Facebook is not Grindr.  If you want to have sex with people, get a cell phone and install Grindr.  Here is a link to Grindr.  Use that, don’t use Facebook to look for sex.

Last night someone sent me a friend request and I gladly accepted because it said we had 1 friend in common, but then he sent me a DM asking for sex.  When I told him I was in a relationship, he asked me to help him find someone who is single.  No!  I’m not going to help you hook up with my friends.  That is not what Facebook is for!

Awhile ago, someone sent me a friend request and I gladly accepted because it also said we had 1 friend in common.  He sent me a DM and we chatted, and then suddenly he told me he was in love with me and that he wanted to be my boyfriend.  You can’t possibly be in love with me after 10 minutes.  I knew I should have ended the friendship right then and there, but he seemed suicidal and I didn’t want to be the reason that someone ended their life.  I think I have finally made it crystal clear that I am not the person for him, but I shouldn’t have to go through that.  I should be able to live my life guilt free without worrying that someone is going to kill themselves.

Speaking of which, I am always saying that if you need a person to talk to because you are suicidal, send me a DM and I will be a shoulder you can cry on.  So these people who send me a friend request then DM for sex are ruining it for those who legitimately want to talk to me because they need someone to talk to.  That’s a real shame that those people have made me not want to accept friendship requests.  Although, if someone did legitimately need someone to talk to, they can send me a DM first and then I will accept their friend request.

My reasons for being on Facebook is to talk with my friends and family.  To see their pictures and read their funny and or corny jokes and see pictures of their barbecue with their families and friends.  To me, Facebook is a website for friends, and that’s it.

I am not a prude, I like sex, but as I said before, I am in a relationship that has lasted for 19 years and I would like to get to 20 years.  I am not your boyfriend and I am not your friend with benefits.  I am just Mike and that’s it.  I save my friendship for people who actually want it.

So from now on, unless you have sent me a message saying who you are and what your intentions are, I will deny all friend requests.  I wish I didn’t have to get to this point that I have to write a blog post explaining why I will be denying friendship requests.

DOMA Unconstitutional and the Repeal of Prop 8

no-doma

Today is a glorious day for LGBT Americans. The Supreme Court of the United States ruled the Defense of marriage act to be unconstitutional. That means that the federal government will recognize the marriage of all Americans, not only heterosexual marriages.

This is a huge step for humanity in my opinion. Although not everyone will agree with me because they believe that marriage is between a man and a woman. Love is love, period. It is none of anyone’s business who loves whom. Period, end of debate. It’s pretty arrogant for anyone to say that my 19 year relationship is less important than Kim Kardashian’s 72 day marriage to Kris Humphries.

We in California will not be able to get married for probably another month, if that, but I do believe that this will boost our bad economy since people will be buying wedding gifts for their friends who will finally be able to get married. So stock up on toasters and blenders while they are still on store shelves.

#MarriageEquality #LoveIsLove #Prop8 #DOMA #DecisionDay

gay toasterI am mentioned in this article from Examiner.com – Central California gay community celebrates DOMA decision by Greg Fields

My Homemade Pecan Butter Cookies

pecan butter cookies

I have been slaving in the kitchen cracking pecans from our pecan tree so that I could make 2 things, pecan butter and pecan butter cookies.  I had collected almost 16oz of pecans.  It didn’t work out as I had planned, but I made it work, sort of.

I added the pecans to the food processor and just obliterated them until they were like sand, and it literally looked like sand on the beach.  I added the peanut oil and brown sugar and blended it some more, but it wouldn’t get soft like peanut butter.  I left it in there for quite a bit too.  I haven’t used our food processor in ages and it’s as old as our relationship is, if not older (which is going on 19 years if you don’t know).  It was starting to give an electrical smell so I was afraid of overdoing it.

The pecan butter didn’t want to become smooth at all.  I tried adding more peanut oil, but it didn’t seem to make a difference, so instead I just went on with the cookie ingredients.  Since it was enough to make 2 batches of cookies, I added 2 cups of sugar and 2 eggs and blended it until it was like dough and took it out.  I cut half of the dough and put half in the fridge wrapped in Saran Wrap and the other half I cut up into squares that I could roll like into balls to form the cookies.  I didn’t get 36 cookies, some were too big and some were too small.  I wish there were a mold that would cut the dough into 36 squares so I could get even cookie sizes lol.

The cookies came out really sweet, I mean too sweet.  They are good, just really sweet.  I didn’t expect that to happen.  I mean, the peanut butter cookies are sweet, but not that sweet.  Also, the dough was really dark, but the cookies came out a lot lighter.  Oh well.

Pecan cookies are certain not something I would ever try to do again, same with the pecan butter, so this was an experience that I will remember for as long as I live.  The lesson, leave the pecans for pie…

It’s Our 17 Year Anniversary

Today is our 17 year anniversary.  We met in 1994 and we just clicked and became a couple.  Most people count their wedding anniversary, not the day they became a couple but considering gays still can’t get married in California, I count our relationship years instead.  Even if we could get married, I would still count how long we’ve been together.

Ok so the cake doesn’t look great, I was running out of frosting, you know how those frosting containers only have so much and I think I put too much in some spots but not enough in others which is why there is a hole on the side in the front but it’s ok, at least I didn’t have to pay $20 for it from the grocery store.

The cake doesn’t symbolize anything really, I just wanted an excuse to have cake lol.  Obviously I had to photo shop the rainbow heart and 17 years because it was too plain for this post, I wish I had the talent to draw that onto the cake with colored frosting.

Well… to another 17 years.  Cheers!

Pray the Gay Away?

Thanks to the Oprah Winfrey Network (the new OWN channel) we have some new shows to watch on TV and Our America with Lisa Ling is among one of them that I am interested in watching.

Todays episode was “Pray the Gay Away?” along with a very special primetime episode of the new Gayle King Show where they discuss the episode, take calls and talk to participants from the documentary.

I think that every gay person has their own beliefs as to why there is homosexuality. My own partner of 17 years believes that he is gay because of his parents’ failed marriage when his father came back from the Korean War in the mid 50’s. His father came home mentally traumatized and their relationship ended and his father eventually passed away. He believes that the destruction of his parents marriage and subsequent death is what turned him gay. And he has every right to have his opinion whether I or anyone else disagrees with it.

I personally believe that I was born this way because I’ve always had an attractiveness towards the same-sex since I met a cute boy named Ruben when I was 4 years old. I had dreams about him and I just knew that I liked him. There was nothing out of the ordinary that made me choose to like him, I just did.

I mean, one could argue that I may have turned gay because of the abuse I endured throughout my childhood but I didn’t know any better. I thought it was normal for parents to beat their children and call them stupid and retarded and worthless among other names. I saw the way my aunt and uncle raised their 3 kids which was basically the same or worse so that there told me, it’s normal. My cousins were treated way worse than I was and they all turned out straight and so did my sister.

So in my case I just don’t believe that my being abused the same way as 4 other people had any impact on my sexuality because I was the only gay one.

I do have other cousins from a different aunt and uncle who treated their kids like human beings and 2 of them turned out lesbian after suffering no childhood trauma. So what does that tell you? They raised 5 kids and 2 of them turned out differently despite all of them being treated with the same love.

The argument that there is no evidence of a gay gene and that it’s all taught to you, you are born straight but you turn gay from your environment is all bullcrap to me. Maybe the gay gene isn’t meant to be found, maybe we’re chosen for this life for population control or who knows, maybe something else.

This Exodus group tells people that they can change and I feel it is wrong because the only person who can change you is you. If you are gay and you are just so unhappy about it and want to put in the effort to turn straight then go for it. Don’t expect for it to work because you will always be gay no matter what they tell you. But if you are in that much pain about it and you have the will power then fine. Do what you like, it’s your body. But don’t turn around and condemn those who refuse to live a lie for the rest of their existence.

This one woman (whose name escapes me) who is a pastor and says she was a lesbian for 14 or so years but then decided to be straight, she compares homosexuality with addiction to drugs or alcohol. I can’t even begin to think what Bullcrap that is because I’ve been gay for 40 years and celibate for the last 10. I am not going through withdrawals lol. I didn’t go through withdrawals 10 years ago, 5 years ago, 2 years ago, 1 year ago or today. I am completely withdrawal free and unfortunately still sex free but that was never my choice, it was the choice of my partner who has erectile dysfunction (he’s 21 years older than I am) so I have to respect that.

Of course being a born again Christian he tells people that he is abstaining from sex not because of his “ED” but because he is a “non-practicing homosexual” so the church won’t kick him out. And hey, if that’s what you have to do then that’s what you have to do. I have no ill feelings about him for any of that.

That only thing that pissed me off throughout the whole show was that ex-lesbian woman comparing sexuality to addiction. I think that I am living proof that it was never an issue of “I gotta have it” because I don’t gotta have anything. I can certainly abstain with the help of my old childhood friend Tom Thumb and his 4 brothers.

Look if you are a born again christian and you feel that being gay means you are going to hell for it and don’t want that then change yourself because that is what you want to do. Don’t let anyone fool you into thinking it’s wrong because it’s not wrong, it’s natural to want to live a happy life and for someone to tell you that you are sinning are themselves sinning for taking gods job away by acting as judge. There is a recession so let God do his job.

It’s 2011. When is racism and bigotry going to end? Is it going to be soon?

We all believe in what we all want to believe in and these opinions are what I believe in. Thank you for reading.

As for my relationship, our 17 year anniversary is in 2 1/2 weeks. Even I can’t believe it has been 17 years. I am with the person I was meant to be with whether sex is involved in the relationship or not. Sex doesn’t make a relationship, it is only a part of it and who says it even has to be any part of it after so many years? We love each other just the way we are, thin or fat, sick or healthy, till death do we part. In this life and the next as I feel I have found my true soul mate and no church can convince us otherwise.

Happy Thanksgiving

Today is a day that most people spend with their families, watching football, having uncomfortable conversations about their love life or gossiping about the black sheep (that’s me) who did or said what to who. Eat great food and open the button on their pants and unzip their zipper to let their stomach expand so they can breathe and it’s perfectly normal. There might be a fight, someone might come out of the closet, but at least you are with the ones you love.

I miss that.

We’re going to Hometown Buffet today with Venda then we’re gonna go see the movie Unstoppable. I have seen a commercial or 2 about it but I think it came out a long time ago so it’s probably in the little tiny theater. It’s not my choice but that’s what we’re going to see.

On Thanksgiving people usually say what they are thankful for. Well, I am thankful for my health (generic I know but it’s true) and my freedom. I am thankful that I have little drama in my life. You know us gays, always with the drama. Well, not this one. I try to keep all the drama out because what’s the point really? I am thankful that we have the cutest dog in the world who loves us. I am also very thankful that we have a home, a roof over our head with food in our pantry and fridge. And most of all I am thankful that I am in a relationship with the most wonderful person and that relationship has lasted over 16.5 years and is still going strong.

Well, it’s time to go. Thanks for reading and have a wonderful Thanksgiving day with your families wherever you are. Stay safe and don’t drink and drive!

Fake Men

A couple of years ago we were watching Jerry Springer and a “man” came on the show wanting to tell his girlfriend that he was born a woman.  The circumstance was that “he” (she) was in a bar and met a woman and she was attracted to “him” (her) and they began a relationship.  They were having oral sex, he would do that on her that is and she never knew.

Ok, that was strange and stuff but this same person came on the show a 2nd time to tell another woman that he was born a girl.  The 2nd time the same thing happened as the first time, the woman had a bad reaction, beat up the “guy” (girl) and they left.

Well, since that show (or those shows) it has been happening more often.  Just the other day there was one.  There was a commercial for the next Jerry Springer and the same thing but with another person.  What the hell is going on in this world?  Can you imagine what people in other countries think about us?  Because this show is syndicated all around the world.

It’s not limited to women pretending to be men, although we all know that men pretend to be women, it’s actually a lot more common and I see it on Jerry Springer show all the time.  It’s sorta disgusting and pitiful.  I mean, these ugly ass women expect that men are going to want to be with them and not know they are really men?  Hello!  If you have any doubt try to get to 2nd base lol.