I was diagnosed with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome a few years ago after crocheting for 20 years. I didn’t crochet every day, but the last few years that I was able to crochet, let’s just say I crocheted a lot and it ruined my hands. Although I cannot say if that is what ruined my hands, but when I crochet, I get numbness in both hands and my right hand gets pinching in the palm.
I haven’t crocheted for several years because when I was diagnosed with Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, I decided I would stop crocheting to give my hands time to rest and heal so that some day I might be able to crochet again. That some day has come and I still can’t crochet.
Last week I gave away all of my yarn to someone who needs it more than I do. I decided that I didn’t want to part with everything, so I kept the Christmas Ombre yarn which is a color that has not been made in at least 12 years that I know of, but I’m sure it hasn’t been made in more than 12 or 15 years. I have held onto this yarn because I have wanted to make a Christmas blanket and had hoped that I could, but I just don’t see that happening.
Last night I decided that I was going to make one granny square. I crocheted the chain, then did a slip stitch and began making a cluster and both of my hands went numb right away and I started to feel the pinching in my right palm. I thought, screw that, I’m going to make this square if it’s the last thing I do, but I couldn’t do it. I did make 3 rounds, but had to undo the whole thing because I decided against clusters, I wanted to make the clusters 3 double crochet stitches instead, but I couldn’t do it because of my hands. It is sitting on my desk with the 8 chain round and 3 chain and 2 double crochets to make the first cluster, that’s it.
Why does it have to be this way? I have been good, I haven’t been a bad person, why can’t I make a simple granny square? Is it too much to ask? I just want to make a simple blanket, why can’t I do it? I feel like my skill has been amputated and that I am useless, not that I was very useful before, but I’m even less useful now.
Here I can sit typing out a post that is at count 411 words, but I can’t crochet one simple square. It isn’t fair! Why is it that my carpal tunnel syndrome doesn’t apply to typing? Not that I want that to be taken away from me too, but why is it I can do one thing with my hands, but not the other? I don’t get it.
Ok, whatever, I am going to make this blanket. I can suffer the pain enough to do one simple square every day until I have all of the squares that are needed to make a blanket. Every time I complete a square, I can sew it to the one I did the day before, this way there won’t just be a ton of squares with no purpose. I think I can certainly accomplish that… right?
So this is my new project, wish me luck! I’m gonna need it lol.