Tag: agony

Crafting Pains

On By Michel McDonaldIn crafts, Etsy1 Comment

I am a crafter. I think I was born a crafter because I love making things with my hands from raw materials. Everyone loves something that was made specifically for them to enjoy.

When I was 9 years old in the Cub Scouts, I learned to make keychains with 2 strands of Rexlace, or as some people call it “Gimp”. I made a few here and there at that age, but never went further with the craft until I was in my early 30’s when I remembered how fun it was to make, so I decided I wanted to learn all over again. I played around with the 2 strand keychains, but still didn’t know how to finish them, so I did what we did as kids, we burned the strands to melt them together with a lighter. That of course was the wrong way to do it.

Fast forward 10 years to a couple of years ago when I broke my arm and decided I wanted to make keychains again, but this time I learned how to properly finish them. I also learned how to make keychains with more than just 2 strands and in many patterns. I went overboard and opened an Etsy shop to sell my keychains. I wasn’t as successful as I had hoped, but it was fun.

I recently had an order for 200 mini DNA red and white keychains. Unfortunately my carpal tunnel syndrome got in the way, and I was only able to complete half of the order before I was forced to take a break. I shipped out the first 100 in the first week of October, and I just finished the second 100 and am going to ship those out in the morning.

This is a casual business for me. I’m not living on the profits, in fact, when I do get an order, which is very rare, it helps me buy some groceries, or it may help me pay for a new video game, or jewelry that I wanted to buy. I never intended on huge bulk orders like this. It’s nice that someone thinks highly of my work that they want a huge order, but my hands can’t handle the constant torture from pulling strands of plastic lace.

My hands are in so much pain that I wake up every morning in agony. When I go to the gym, if I have my hands up on the bars or on the top of the treadmill, the pain in my thumb is excruciating and I have to bring my arms down to swing.

As of right now, I’m retired from making anything in bulk. I don’t mind making up to 10 keychains,  10 mini or 5 regular size, but that’s it. I’m going to have to just stop the torture on my poor hands. I love the work, and appreciate the groceries and winter cycling gear I was able to buy, but it’s just not worth permanent damage to my hands.

Actually, as of right now I am on vacation from my Etsy shop lol. I honestly don’t even want to think about making keychains and earrings, or even the Friendship bracelets or anything that is repetitive.

Come to think of it, my hands are killing me from typing this blog post. I have to rest my right hand from typing every few minutes, so I’m just going to stop typing and get in bed.

Jumping Through Hoops For Surgery

On By Michel McDonaldIn HealthLeave a comment

Life isn’t fair, is it?  Murphy’s law says that if something can go wrong, it will.  Well, something is very wrong with how long it is taking to get my surgery.  I have been in pain, no, agony for going on 2 months now and I was told I could get surgery to help, yet I don’t see it coming.

I was diagnosed with Sialolithiasis which means my right Parotid gland (saliva gland) has stones in it.  You know how you get kidney stones?  Well, the saliva gland can get stones too.  The problem is that the stones are preventing the saliva from being released into my mouth and that causes it to swell up.  I can push on it and I can feel the saliva squirt into my mouth, and that relieves the pressure which is very painful.  I have been doing that for years, yes this has been happening to me for many years.  I would guess up to 10 years that I can recall.  I know it’s more, but I can’t be sure when it began.

So first thing that happened was it started and I waited a few days to call the doctor.  I figured that it has happened so many times in my adulthood and that I was almost positive it would go away from pushing on it, but it wasn’t going away, it was just getting worse and worse and there was a blockage preventing the saliva from releasing.  I made an appointment which meant I had to wait for a weekend.  I went to the doctor and he gave me an antibiotic and saw me again in 7 days.  I came back in 7 days and he gave me another antibiotic and told me that I might need surgery.  If this antibiotic doesn’t help in another week then I could get surgery if I chose to.

Naturally, it didn’t go away after that 2nd week.  In the past it has always gone away after taking the antibiotics, but this one has stayed with me.  He sent me to have an ultrasound which showed that I had a stone that was 1cm.  Look at your ruler, that’s nearly half an inch.  He then referred me to an Ear, Nose, Throat specialist who sent me for an CT scan with contrast which showed that I have multiple stones, not just on the right side, but also on the left.  The left side swells up as well, but not as bad as the right side.  The doctor said that the left side were much smaller, so it’s not as big of an emergency as the right side is.

The ENT doctor referred me to a surgeon at Kern Medical Center aka KMC which I always joke and call it KFC.  He gave me my options and I chose to go to LA, but then changed my mind and wanted to have him do the surgery.  Before he can do anything, he needs my original doctor to sign off on it because I have some other health concerns that had to be tested before he would do surgery.  My doctor had blood drawn and did an EKG which showed heart trouble.  UGH!

heart monitor I finally went to the heart doctor today and they gave me another EKG and put a heart monitor on me that I have to wear for 24 hours.  It has been recording since around 2pm or so.  I had to change my physical therapy for my scoliosis issue tomorrow from 10:45am to 2:30pm.  I hope that gives them a full 24 hours, but the nurse told me that I could take it off before 24 hours was up if I had to.  They also made 2  more appointments for me, one in 2 weeks and then another in October.

October?  What?  I needed my surgery like a month ago!  I’m so sick of this pain.  I mean, the pain isn’t as bad as it was for 2 months, but it’s still bad.  The pain from my saliva gland makes me think my teeth need to be pulled.  I know having my teeth pulled isn’t the answer because that’s not where the pain is coming from, the pain is just travelling to those places.  When I don’t have pain in my saliva gland then my teeth are fine.  If the problem was my teeth then I would feel the pain in my teeth when I didn’t feel pain in my saliva gland.

So I am hoping that I can get my surgery in October because I don’t think I can wait very much longer after that.  I just can’t take it anymore.  Nobody should have to live in constant pain every day like this.  There really isn’t anything I can do, so I guess I have no choice but to deal with it.  I really hope that it gets taken care of soon.

I am finally not in any pain

On By Michel McDonaldIn Doctor, Exercise, Health, PainLeave a comment

pain

I have been going to Jacobo Physical Therapy 3 days a week for a few weeks and I can’t believe it but, I am not in any pain.  I can’t say that this is a permanent thing, because I do occasionally feel pain, but it’s not a constant nagging in my spine like it normally is 24 hours a day.

A few years ago I was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease, but recently in the last month I found out from x-rays that I also have scoliosis.  I was wondering why I was in constant agony, now I know why.  My doctor sent me to physical therapy and I go there three days a week.  They give me certain exercises I can do for 30 minutes, then someone comes in and gives me a soft tissue massage.

Dr. Jacobo told me that my insurance will only cover so many visits per year, so once I’m done with physical therapy, I’m on my own.  She said they will see me three days next week, but after that I can come once a week.  I am not sure if my insurance will pay for once a week, but I hope they do.

weider total body works 5000She told me that they can give me a printout of all of my exercises in case I forget what they are so that I can do them at home.  I have a Weider Total Body Works 5000 which I can use to help me.  Some of the exercises I do use weights, so that’s where my home gym will come in.  Not all of the exercises will require using the gym, so I will have to remember them and try to make it a daily ritual to keep my back pain down to an absolute minimum, if that is possible.

I’m wondering if I should set up my video camera so I can do all of the exercises so if I ever forget how to do them, I can always refer to the tape, or well, DVD since it’s a DVD Camcorder.  I think that would be a good idea because I know I will forget if I don’t make it a habit.

I bought that Weider Total Body Works 5000 in 2005 from Wal-mart’s website for $99.  Now they are $149 at Wal-Mart and $159 at Target.  It’s $400 and $1000 on Amazon, which is amazing that they would sell it for that much money since you can buy it much cheaper at Wally World and Target.

My gym is outside in our patio which makes it a miserable experience because it’s way too hot out there to use it, but there isn’t any room for it inside the house.  I’m pretty sure I can deal with using it out there for half an hour per day if it will help me with my pain levels.  Although I can’t say that I will get my massages, but I guess I will just have to deal without those lol.

The good thing about these exercises is that they taught me how to stretch my legs while laying down when I start and when I finish, so I can use that knowledge for when I ride my bike.  It’s always a good idea to stretch before and after a bike ride.

I really hope my pain levels aren’t as high as they used to be without going to physical therapy 3 days a week.  If you have ever suffered from back pain, then you know what that constant nagging pain feels like, so you understand.  Most people who don’t have any back pain never understand.  In fact, some people feel that because they don’t have that same or any pain that they don’t think we are in any pain at all.  It’s a “if I’m not in pain, then you aren’t in any pain either” type of thing I guess.

Pain meds don’t always help me.  I’ve taken Ibuprofen, Vicodin, muscle relaxers, Tylenol, Advil etc.  Nothing works.  Although when I broke my arm I was constantly medicating myself with Vicodin which took ALL my pain away.  I think that was the best vacation from pain I’ve been on in a long time.  When my arm healed and I stopped taking the Vicodin, the back pain returned.  I have taken more Vicodin since then, but it doesn’t do any good.

I think I spoke too soon because I’m getting shooting pain in the middle of my spine.  YIKES!  Well, let’s hope that it doesn’t get worse.  I think I will take something for it now.  I bought some generic “Pain Relief PM” from Dollar General for $1 to help with the pain and to help me sleep.  I really hope that doing those exercises at home will help because I don’t think I can take being in as much pain as I was before going to Jacobo Physical Therapy.  That really is no way to live.

My plateau seems to be over

On By Michel McDonaldIn Diet, Health, Noom, WeightLeave a comment

sports coats

I’ve been freaking out a bit over the last couple of weeks because last week’s weigh in was the same as 2 weeks ago, 197lbs.  Well, today was weigh in day and I weighed in at 195.2lbs.  I should have been 195lbs last week, but I guess better late than never.

So I have to wonder about a couple of things.  Like, in the beginning when I started this journey with Noom I was losing 3-4lbs per week, but then it started to slow down with 2-3lbs and then 1-2lbs etc.  The last month I have been walking and I have been eating a lot more veggies than I used to, and this last week I haven’t gone on any walks and I’ve been laying off the extra veggies and only eating the weight watchers and I lost 2lbs, well, 1.8lbs, but still.  I wonder, did walking and adding so many veggies to my diet really make a difference in my weight loss that would keep me from losing a certain amount every week?  Maybe it was the butter and margarine that I put on the veggies.

I know that a proper diet and exercise is essential to a good weight loss plan, so I’m not saying I shouldn’t be eating extra veggies and exercising.  I should be doing both, but with my back constantly hurting, it makes it difficult to want to go out for walks.  I know there are lots of exercises that I can do at home on my couch or bed or desk chair, but again, my back is in constant agony, so it makes it really difficult to want to do anything.  I mean, I want to succeed, and I feel that I am, but it’s just taking longer now lol.

I feel that I am succeeding though.  Take the picture above for example.  I just wanted to see if these 2 sports coats would fit, and they actually did.  I haven’t worn mine since 1999 when we bought them for a christening.  Well, I wore the grey one for the christening, my partner wore the tan one.  The grey one looks a little bigger than the tan one, so I’m thinking that I was a bit fatter than he was back then.  Well, they both fit me now.  I do remember that back then I was around 190-200lbs so this is about the right weight to be able to wear them, and it’s a good thing they fit me now with all the weddings I’m probably going to be attending now that same-sex marriage is now legal in California.

I wasn’t trying to look like Don Johnson from Miami Vice with my t-shirt and necklace, what you don’t see is that I was also wearing shorts lol.  I just wanted to see if they fit and I didn’t even notice how thin my face looked when I looked in the mirror, I didn’t see it until I saw the pictures.  So I’m very happy with my progress.

So I hope that next week I am down to 193lbs and I hope I don’t plateau again , but if I do, that’s okay too because I am not trying to lose weight for anything or anyone in particular, I am doing this for me.

Until next week…

Plateau

On By Michel McDonaldIn Diet, Health, Noom, WeightLeave a comment

A couple of days ago I mentioned that I had hit a plateau or that I thought I might have hit a plateau, well, today was weigh in day and it confirmed that I indeed have hit a plateau.

Last week I weighed in at 197.0 lbs, but the very next day I weighed in at 196.6 lbs.  I’m not exactly sure why I weighed in, perhaps the app suggested that I weigh in again, who knows, but today I am 197 again.

That’s okay because I have come this far and this is my first plateau since January, so I think I’m doing pretty good considering I have lost 66 lbs in just 24 weeks.  I’m totally fine with the plateau.

I love my body now, before I couldn’t stand looking in the mirror.  I couldn’t stand looking down and seeing a fat belly.  I couldn’t stand how fat my face was and how fat my neck was.  The chin was just so horrible.  But I couldn’t be happier with my body and my neck and my chin lol.  I just feel so happy now.

My partner suggested that we go on a walk this morning and so we did.  It wasn’t a very long walk and I was in a lot of pain.  I touched my back where the pain was because I wanted to rub it, but it was completely numb.  I mean, I could feel the pain, more like agony, but my skin and muscles were numb.  That seems to be what happens when I have back pain.

When we came home I immediately had him put a Salonpas patch on my back and knowing that it usually takes half an hour to activate, I put ice on it so that it’s like an icy hot thing lol.

So back to the plateau.  I don’t know why I am in a plateau.  I have been eating the same exact way this week that I have been eating in the last 24 weeks and I have been eating under 1400 calories per day.  I have also been going for walks more in the last couple of weeks than I have in the last 24 weeks, which is probably why I have hit a plateau because I’m probably gaining muscle, and we all know that muscle weighs more than fat.

Although this week I was eating popcorn with oil but no salt and no butter, and I was eating those Lean Gourmet meals which have a lot of sodium in them, so perhaps that might be adding to the problem.  I am out of the popcorn and I will try to eat the Smart Ones instead of the Lean Gourmet to see if that will help.

I hope next Saturday I will have some progress.  No matter what happens, I will continue eating healthy and entering all of my food into the Noom app.

Week 23 with @Noom

On By Michel McDonaldIn Diet, Health, Noom, WeightLeave a comment

week 23 profile

Today is the first day of my second week with my second goal and I have lost less than 2lbs.  I was so hoping to lose 2lbs or more.  On the last day of my first goal I was 200lbs on a Friday, two days later on Sunday, I weighed 199 and a day or two later 198.  So, to still be at 198 sucks.  If I was 198 on a Tuesday, then wouldn’t you think that by Saturday I would be 197 or 196?

I am not going to stress myself out over this because at least I lost weight this week.  I could have hit a plateau and I could still be 200lbs, or worse, so I am going to take this as a positively as I can.

My profile says that I have 0 workouts per week, and that is because I never plan a workout since I don’t have a bicycle.  My back is always in pain and if I decide I want to go for a walk then I will do it, but I don’t want to feel pressure to do it by my phone.  I have an app called Squats that is constantly beeping and reminding me to do squats, but I am always in too much pain to even get out of my chair or get out of bed, so I just ignore the reminder.  When I do go for a walk, I am in agony the entire time.

My pain:

I have not really explained the pain I feel with degenerative disc disease.  I am not a scientist or a doctor, so I can’t really know for sure that this is happening, but with degenerative disc disease, your discs are well, degenerating, they are wearing out, they are thinner than they are supposed to be so it feels like my spine bones are grinding together.  It feels like I am getting 10 shots all in the same spot all at the same time.  I also have nerve damage in my back, so I can’t feel the skin on my back, so when I am touching my back in the area that I am having pain, it’s like I am touching someone else’s skin.  I wish that it was in reverse, where I can feel the skin but not the pain in my spine, but it is what it is.

So now you know what happens when I try to take a walk.  I go out and I am fine for the first 5 minutes, but then my pain starts to come on gradually, by 20 minutes the grinding is intense.  These walks might take 30 to 40 minutes so you can only imagine how I am feeling by the time I get home.  Oh and that’s only 2 miles by the way.  It’s not really that far.  This is what my walk looks like.

walk 2013-06-08_10-45-10

This is the last walk I went on.  I went to the post office to drop off a package, and then I decided to just keep walking.  You can see where it says Oleander/Sunset, that’s where I live, where I started walking, the bottom right is the post office.  I went South to the post office, then West, then North, then East and then South to come back home.  That is a typical walk, and that is only 2.07 miles.

It’s not a lot of distance, but it’s way too much for my back to handle.  I insist on walking this far because I want to succeed.  No pain, no gain, right?  Although the pain they are referring to is from muscle tearing while you are working out, not your spine grinding, but still.

I would love to go for walks everyday and for a lot more distance than just 2 miles, but it’s just too painful, so I can only do it a couple or a few times per week.  I wish that I could fix my bicycle or buy a new one, but I just can’t afford it right now, so walking is my only cardio option for now.

I am hoping to lose more than just 1.8lbs next week, but I am not going to put pressure on myself if I don’t because I can only do so much with what I have.  Like I have said in the past, at least I haven’t hit a plateau or gone back up in weight.  Let’s see where I am at next Saturday.

A message from the American Osteopathic Association

On By Michel McDonaldIn AdLeave a comment

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Michaelbeitz for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.

Are you aware that more than 100 million Americans live in constant chronic pain from sitting in their office desk chair?  70% of them sit in their desk chairs for more than 5 hours per day and 2 in 5 wouldn’t even consider getting out of their chair to talk to a co-worker, they probably chat on the phone or send each other text messages.  That’s how lazy electronics are making us, but I’m sure they would just rather not get up because they are in too much pain, and I can certainly understand that because I am one of them.  I have been diagnosed with Degenerative Disc Disease and I am in constant agony, so much that even prescription strength Ibuprofen won’t help.

The American Osteopathic Association is helping Americans avoid and prevent pain in the workplace by showing some stretch exercises that you can do at your desk chair to help relieve some of the pain.  Take a look.

I did do those exercises and I will start doing those stretches because I am sick of being in pain every minute of every day with no help from medication.  There is something you can do to help your back pain.  Get up and get some exercise.  Go to the office kitchen (if any) and wipe down the counters or make a new pot of coffee.  Sweep and mop the floor, even if it isn’t your job.  Instead of sending your co-worker a text message or calling them, go talk to them in person.  When you are sitting in your desk chair, don’t slouch, sit up straight.  There are lots of things you can do to help your pain, so why not help yourself by being more active?  Visit the American Osteopathic Association for more information.

Visit Sponsor's Site

EverQuest 2

On By Michel McDonaldIn EverQuestLeave a comment

The name you all know and love “Xanapus” comes from the original EverQuest.  It was a game generated name, but it was originally spelled Xandapus.  I played that character for a few days and was told I better start all over because I didn’t put the starting points to “int” (intelligence).  When I deleted the character, I went back into character selection and tried it again, but it wouldn’t let me use the name again.  I had gotten a little used to that name and I didn’t want to have to change it, so I just dropped the “d” and I became Xanapus.  That was June 29th 2002.

I quit playing EverQuest a few years ago after playing for 6 or 7 long years.  Day in and day out 16 hours a day non stop playing.  It took a serious toll on me because I didn’t know what else to do with my life.

Why did I spend so much time on the game you ask?  Well, I am legally disabled so what else is there for me to do?  I can’t stand for more than 10 minutes, I can’t lift boxes, I can’t even bend over out of fear of my back locking up on me, which happens more frequently than you think.  I am in constant agony from my back because I have Degenerative Disc Disease in my lower spine.  So I can’t work, I sit at the computer which also sometimes takes it’s toll on my back so I have to be careful to be as comfortable as I can.

So recently I had started to get lonely for the game so I decided to download it again and set up my account for $14.95 a month and get back to the daily grind.  I began playing a newbie character who was level 12 I believe, and got him into his mid 40’s in just a few short weeks, but I wanted to play my old guys like Xanapus and Perceus again.  I did, or at least tried to, but I found myself bored again already.  I decided why not try out EverQuest 2 and see what’s going on there, I had to get a memory upgrade, but I started playing it and I got that spark back because this is a whole new game with all new graphics and all new zones and all new adventures.  That is what I missed the most, was the adventuring.

I was having fun, but since the game was free I started to notice all of the restrictions for free players.  I figured, if I want to play this, I gotta pay the money, but I don’t want to have to keep paying them just so I can get a backpack or so I can do this or that, so I changed my subscription with EverQuest 1 to a station pass for all of the Sony Online Entertainment games for $19.95 a month.  Now for only $5 more, I can play all of their games, like Star Wars, DC Comics and whatever else they have.  That’s a way better deal if you ask me.

So this is great.  I can finally stop obsessing over who in the news is calling who anti-gay slurs and who is trying to take away my right to marry, now I can focus on actual fun, something that will give me a few hours a day to escape the real world.  Think of it as a vacation for my brain lol.

I took this video tonight in EverQuest 2 of me flying a Griffin.  Pretty cool mode of transportation if you ask me.  Anyway, till next time.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SttQ1wd1pEo

Break From Restoring Blog

On By Michel McDonaldIn Daily BlogLeave a comment

I have to take a few days off from restoring posts for September 2009 all the way through June of 2010.

First of all it’s hell on my hands.  With Carpal Tunnel syndrome both of my hands are getting numb a lot from this, resting my wrist on the laptop or even on the gel mouse pad is bad for my wrists because it puts way too much pressure on my wrists.  If it were softer then I might be ok but for some reason it’s a really hard surface.  After a few hours my wrists are in agony and my eyes too, I can’t see anything because I’m staring at the computer so much.

We have family visiting next week and I really need to put this blog on hold until the house is clean.  It’s not a mess but there are some places that need to be cleaned and it’s embarrassing when people can spot the dust I didn’t clean :D.

I would say give me a few days but I’m sure it won’t take that long, but you never know for sure.

Will The New Diet Stick?

On By Michel McDonaldIn Cycling, Diet, ExerciseLeave a comment

Yesterday I went to the grocery store and bought about 10 power bars and 4 tigers milk bars for my bike rides so that should last me awhile.  Well, at least 14 rides anyway.  Actually that should last me the whole month since I ride 3 days a week.  Plus I bought 2 cans of Slim Fast Ultima.

I also bought a box of muffins because they were reduced for quick sale.  It had 2 bran muffins and 2 blueberry muffins.  I ate 1 blueberry muffin for breakfast and a slim fast shake for lunch then nothing all day until dinner time and we went to Que Pasa for dinner where I had a 2 item combo, beef Enchilada and beef burrito with rice and beans on the plate.  Then with my ambien I had a banana.  Food helps the ambien kick in faster.

It seems to have done some good for me because I’ve finally noticed some weight loss on the scale.

While I was at the store yesterday I bought 2 bags of the salad mix so when dinner rolls around I can eat some salad instead of the usual pasta or pizzas that we eat.

It’s time for me to start taking responsibility for what I eat and just say no when confronted with certain foods that I like.  I REALLY want to lose this weight but at the same time all this food is coming at me left and right, sometimes I just can’t say no.

I was going to ride today but my thighs are just in so much agony so I’m going to just stay home.  Our new tenant moved in yesterday and I’m going to help them with the rest of the heavy stuff in the U-Haul.  It rained yesterday from about 3pm until late last night but the street seems to be dry as a bone now.  I was going to use that as my excuse for not riding but frankly I can’t lol.  I’m just going to say that my legs are tired, I’ll do it tomorrow.