EverQuest 2

The name you all know and love “Xanapus” comes from the original EverQuest.  It was a game generated name, but it was originally spelled Xandapus.  I played that character for a few days and was told I better start all over because I didn’t put the starting points to “int” (intelligence).  When I deleted the character, I went back into character selection and tried it again, but it wouldn’t let me use the name again.  I had gotten a little used to that name and I didn’t want to have to change it, so I just dropped the “d” and I became Xanapus.  That was June 29th 2002.

I quit playing EverQuest a few years ago after playing for 6 or 7 long years.  Day in and day out 16 hours a day non stop playing.  It took a serious toll on me because I didn’t know what else to do with my life.

Why did I spend so much time on the game you ask?  Well, I am legally disabled so what else is there for me to do?  I can’t stand for more than 10 minutes, I can’t lift boxes, I can’t even bend over out of fear of my back locking up on me, which happens more frequently than you think.  I am in constant agony from my back because I have Degenerative Disc Disease in my lower spine.  So I can’t work, I sit at the computer which also sometimes takes it’s toll on my back so I have to be careful to be as comfortable as I can.

So recently I had started to get lonely for the game so I decided to download it again and set up my account for $14.95 a month and get back to the daily grind.  I began playing a newbie character who was level 12 I believe, and got him into his mid 40’s in just a few short weeks, but I wanted to play my old guys like Xanapus and Perceus again.  I did, or at least tried to, but I found myself bored again already.  I decided why not try out EverQuest 2 and see what’s going on there, I had to get a memory upgrade, but I started playing it and I got that spark back because this is a whole new game with all new graphics and all new zones and all new adventures.  That is what I missed the most, was the adventuring.

I was having fun, but since the game was free I started to notice all of the restrictions for free players.  I figured, if I want to play this, I gotta pay the money, but I don’t want to have to keep paying them just so I can get a backpack or so I can do this or that, so I changed my subscription with EverQuest 1 to a station pass for all of the Sony Online Entertainment games for $19.95 a month.  Now for only $5 more, I can play all of their games, like Star Wars, DC Comics and whatever else they have.  That’s a way better deal if you ask me.

So this is great.  I can finally stop obsessing over who in the news is calling who anti-gay slurs and who is trying to take away my right to marry, now I can focus on actual fun, something that will give me a few hours a day to escape the real world.  Think of it as a vacation for my brain lol.

I took this video tonight in EverQuest 2 of me flying a Griffin.  Pretty cool mode of transportation if you ask me.  Anyway, till next time.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SttQ1wd1pEo

Growing Old (un)Gracefully

Do you mind if I vent for a few minutes about something that has been bothering me?  Of course you don’t mind, I mean, that’s why you’re here right?  To listen to me venting, I mean, that’s what a blog is right?

I don’t know what it is but the older I get, the more of a prick I become.  I don’t know why.  I mean, it could be me or it could be people constantly pushing me to becoming a prick day in and day out.

I’m constantly being pressured to do something I don’t feel comfortable doing and eating foods that I don’t want to eat for one reason or another.  No means no right?  When you say “oh no, that’s not what I want to eat” that means that’s not what the f I want to eat, does it not?  It doesn’t mean, keep pressuring me because I can’t make my own GD decisions.  It means I don’t fricken’ want it so stop GD asking me!

Oh sorry where was I?

Oh yeah, I’m going through some weird stuff with my body right now and I’m just constantly irritable because of the constant pain I’m always in.  I’m only 40, turning 41 and I feel like I’m in my 80’s.  I feel twice as old as I am.

My back is in constant pain because I have degenerative disc disease.  Do you know what that means?  Well, it’s really self-explanatory, my discs are degenerating.  It’s really simple.  Take a marshmallow and flatten it a bit.  Ok that is what the discs look like that are cushioning your spine bones.  Now, press on it and flatten it some more so it’s really thin.  That’s what my discs are doing.  So if my discs are thinning out because they are degenerating what do you think is happening to my bones?  It’s a constant pain from the minute I wake up until the minute I go to sleep at night.

I’m losing my eyesight.  I don’t know if this is normal but all of a sudden it’s like something clouds my eyes, both of them, not at the same time obviously.  I have to rub my eyes to get it out and it’s fine but it’s constantly coming back.  My eyes aren’t that great to begin with, I mean, I’m having to look through the bifocal part of my glasses to read as I type this which isn’t a good thing since I should be able to see with the top part.

Apparently I’m also losing my hearing because every time people talk around me they are talking so low that I can’t hear a word they are saying.  I feel like I’m being left out of nearly every conversation.  I feel like yelling “SPEAK UP” but then I’m afraid of how crazy I must sound so I just ignore people who are talking and think about something else and just nod as they talk.

I have really bad carpal tunnel syndrome too so either one or both of my hands are either numb or pins and needles at any given time, usually all the time.  I can’t open jars anymore on my own, oh no I need help with that.  I have these muscles on my arms and I can’t even open a jar or a can without help.  I have a one-touch can opener because I can’t even open a fricken’ can of tuna on my own anymore.

I have people asking me if there is something wrong and asking me why I’m so irritable, and this from people who are older than I am.  It’s like, you of all people should be more sympathetic knowing how the aging process goes.

I’m only 40!!!  This isn’t supposed to happen to me!!!  I mean gawd, I’m like 15 years old on the inside but 80 on the outside.  I really hate this.

Despite this I try to be in a good mood but I have people constantly irritating me and making me feel like I have no basis for being irritable, like I’m making up the problems or something for attention then they look at me like I’m being a drama queen.  I don’t want that kind of attention, I just want people to back the f up and realize that I’m just trying to live a normal life without all of the complications that life gives me, I don’t need them adding complications by treating me like I’m nuts.

Wow you know I feel so much better now.  Thank you so much for helping me get through this.  Now GET OFF MY LAWN you dirty sonsabitches!  LOL just kidding…

My New Bike Wheel

Some time last year the back wheel on my bicycle bit the dust.  I don’t know what happened but the axle unscrewed to one side which made the nuts and ball bearings fall out.  I really screwed up that wheel and haven’t been able to afford a new one.

I’ve made it my ultimate priority this month to buy a new wheel because I am just getting too heavy not being able to exercise.  Since I have a bad back I need a low impact cardio exercise and it’s the perfect exercise machine.

Chips cousins life partner just so happened to buy a vintage 10 speed road bicycle today so now we can get out on the bike trail together.  She hasn’t been on a bicycle in 30 years so she is pretty out of shape.  It’s been a year for me and I know I’m out of shape but not as much as her so we’re going to take it real slow for her sake.

I’m really happy and very excited that I can start riding the bike to the store again because walking to the store and carrying groceries was wreaking havoc on my back and my hands/wrists because of my carpal tunnel syndrome and degenerative disc disease.  I hate the aging process lol.

I didn’t get a picture but I’m sure you know what a bicycle wheel looks like lol.

Why Can’t I Lose Weight?

I don’t understand why I’m not able to lose weight.  I have changed my diet completely, I have basically done a 180° and yet I still can’t lose weight.

I stopped drinking soda, coffee and tea and I only drink water but that didn’t make any difference because I’m still gaining.  I stopped making pasta meals and started eating more veggies and sometimes only eat veggies and yet that hasn’t made any difference because I’m still gaining.

I haven’t started exercising though because I’m in too much pain.  If I had a back wheel for my bicycle then I would be able to ride my bike, although it has a weight limit of 250lbs and I’m 258 now so I would probably have to wait a bit to do that.  I tried walking but I get back pain after like 5 minutes then I have to sit down.  I have degenerative disc disease in my spine which makes it very difficult to do anything really.

I am seeing the doctor this week on Thursday and I know he’s going to bitch at me for not losing weight again this month.  But nobody can say I haven’t tried because I have made the change to my diet.  Until I can get an easier way to exercise, I’m kinda stuck.