In Memory of Vedra Jean Luttrell

We have recently suffered the loss of a great friend and family member; Chips cousin has unexpectedly and wrongfully passed away at the age of 62.

I first met Vedra in the mid 90’s when Darrin and I would travel from Hollywood to Bakersfield to visit his mom for Mother’s Day. Every year Vedra would send a flier in the mail telling us about the family reunion and pot luck in the park and it was something that I always looked forward to, not just for the good food but to see her since we clicked so well.

We moved to Bakersfield in 2000 so we were able to see her more than just once a year but little did I know, she only lived 2 blocks from us.  When I learned that she lived so close, we started to see her more often and we met her life partner Venda.  Next thing you know, we’re all trading birthday gifts with each other.

The circumstances with which Vedra has left this world is very painful and I will not go into any details as I would like this to be a celebration of her life but let’s never forget the tragedy for why she is not with us today.

There won’t be a funeral but there will be a celebration of life party at one of Vedras sisters house in mid November.  I like celebration of life parties because you aren’t just mourning her death but also celebrating her life.  I have been to 3 such parties in my life and it’s a better way to say goodbye with a smile and a tear at the same time.

We will miss you and never forget you Vedra.

My Most Embarrassing Moment in History

I know that every time something embarrassing happens to me I always say that it is the most embarrassing moment in my life but I have to say that those don’t even compare to what happened to me today.

Ok so we went to Albertson’s this morning before Darrin dropped me off at the doctors off before he went to work.  He bought some toothpaste because we were out and he also grabbed a 1 liter bottle of flavored water for himself and 1 for me too.  So he drops me off at the doctor’s office and I go in, sign in, sit down and am watching TV and waiting patiently to be called.  Then tragedy struck.

You know when you have a room temperature bottle of sparkling water or soda or something and you unscrew the cap and it starts to fizz up so you have to open then close the lid over and over because if you don’t it explodes all over the place?  I had already done that and taken a sip or 2 out of the water.  Well, I was sitting there just watching TV and I opened the lid and all was fine, no fizzing occurred.  I put the bottle up to my mouth and it just exploded all over me.  OMG!

My whole front was completely soaking wet.  At first I thought it was a dream, I must be sleeping still at home.  I’m asleep and the people in the waiting room don’t even acknowledge my existence here.  Unfortunately, the realization came over me that I was indeed awake and there were other people in the waiting room staring at me.  The only thing that I could say was “that did not just happen to me”.

When it happened it was just so fast, so all of a sudden.  I wasn’t expecting that to happen, although I guess nobody does really.  I tried stopping it by pressing my lips around the bottle but the pressure built up in my mouth and I had to let go so I put my finger in the bottle as if I were a little dutch boy trying to stop the flow of water in the hole in a dam.

So desperately I went over to the door and started knocking on it and I heard Donna say hang on and I’m like ok, this is sort of an emergency, I need someone to please assist in my suicide lol.  So she opens the door and I walk in and she had this look on her face like OMG what happened.  I said my water exploded all over me.  She said it looks like I peed then threw up all over my shirt (as if I had a liquid lunch lol there were no chunks, just water).  I went to the bathroom and blotted as much as I could but no matter how many paper towels I used, I wouldn’t come out of it dry.

So then I went back to the door to the waiting room and said please don’t make me go back out there.  Then Jennifer comes along and sees me and I thought it would be funny to tell her “I’m really nervous today” at which point her jaw hit the ground.  She knows that I would never piss my pants and she saw the water bottle so she started laughing.  I told her my best course of action is to just pour the rest of it down the front of my shorts to even it out lol.

But luckily it started drying fast and by the time I left the doctor’s office my shorts were completely dry.  So at least I didn’t have to ride the bus with wet shorts on.  I guess this is my karma for talking trash about the Jonas Brothers the other night.  But in my defense I did delete it before anyone could see what a jerk I was.  Then again I’m sure a few people saw it in the 2 minutes it took me to decide to delete it, but I doubt it.

Howard Goes To Jail

Howard K. Stern turns himself in today for allegedly illegally obtaining prescription drugs for Anna Nicole Smith.

It’s about freakin time I say.  If he hadn’t been allegedly supplying her with drugs she and her son might still be alive today.  Although I don’t know for a fact that her son died from this but I’m certain it probably had something to do with it.

Every time I watched her reality show on E! I knew something was wrong with her, no normal person acts like they are drugged up if they aren’t taking something.  She was constantly slurring and walking as if she were drunk.  And that crazy clown video should have been proof enough that she was on something.

Despite her crazy behavior, I really liked her and it was very upsetting when she passed away.  I felt really sorry for her when her son died but then she died and it was a real tragedy.

I really hope that Howard goes to prison for this.