‎30-40% of Homeless Youth Identify as LGBT

I saw this link on the Bakersfield Gay and Lesbian Center Facebook page this morning.

Young, Gay And Homeless: Fighting For Resources – NPR

I was a homeless gay teen.  I was kicked out of the house when I was 15 years old for not wanting to visit my mother in the hospital.  I was homeless for 6 months wondering day-to-day when I was going to get my next meal.

I was homeless again when I was 17 years old because my mother rejected me for being gay.  She confronted me about being gay then 2 weeks later kicked me out of the house.  She made me choose between being gay and being her son.

I know what it’s like to be homeless so I understand this story more than anyone in the world.

This article says that there are 3,800 homeless teens in New York City and only 250 beds.  I have a solution if anyone will hear me out.  Anyone who identifies as Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual or Transgendered or even a PFLAG member can invite them into their home to stay with them for a short time.  Help them get their GED (if they didn’t get to graduate high school) and help them find a job.  After 3 months they will have enough money saved up to get their own apartment and it will all be because you helped them.

When I was homeless the second time around, the Salvation Army church helped me but they weren’t allowed to know that I was gay because if they found out, they would have kicked me out.  Being rejected once by your family is one thing but then to be rejected by the church is devastating.  If we are going to tell them that it gets better, we need to prove it by showing them that it gets better by helping them.

Think of it as adopting a child, because they are still children after all.  These children are teenagers but they are still children whose childhood was taken away from them.  Give it back to them by helping them get off the streets.

And you parents, you should be ashamed of yourselves.  Waiting until their 18th birthday to kick out your own child just because they are gay.  Especially around the holidays.  SHAME SHAME SHAME!  You kick them out of the house because your religion says that it’s wrong.  So abandoning them is right?  You think they are going to hell?  So you think that God will approve of how you treated your child?  Think again.

In Your Face!

You know how some people are homophobic but they don’t throw it in your face but you know they are because they give you a disapproving glare or they make snarky comments when referring to your sexuality?  Well, I have one particular family member who is sort of like that.  The whole gay issue is never brought up, like it’s so shameful that we just don’t talk about it out of fear that it will tear our relationship apart because of differing opinions or something.

I was talking with said family member on the phone today who was the only family member by the way who ever calls me on my birthday and she was 6 days late calling me.  But the subject of Chips deceased cousins relationship came up and she asked how long they were together and I said 27 years.  “Wow, how long have you guys been together” she asks which I respond 17 years. “WOW!”

I get no gratification for throwing it in her face that I am in a long-term relationship but when you tell a person like her who is against gay relationships that you have been together for 17 years and they have a “WOW” response, it makes you feel good.  Like “IN YOUR FACE” or something.  Not a mean in your face but you know.

I would say that I am the black sheep to half of my family because of my sexuality which if you think about it is such a stupid reason to be the black sheep.  I mean, I was born this way, you don’t make me a black sheep because I was born with hazel eyes and brown hair do you?  Of course not because that is absurd.  So why make me the black sheep because of my sexuality which I have no control over just like I have no control over the fact that I have male pattern baldness.

You know what I say to society, I’m here, I’m queer, get effing used to it biatches!  I’m in a committed long-term monogamous relationship with a person with whom I love and nothing anyone says about it is going to change that.  Get over your insecurities about gay people and realize we aren’t going to change.  We do have loving normal relationships just like all of you straight people.  The only difference is that we can’t get each other pregnant, which if you think about it is more of a blessing cause who wants that?  Not me!

I am so sick of people judging me so yeah, I get a little excited when someone who doesn’t approve has a moment when they are impressed by it.  As if I was ever seeking approval, I’m not but you know what I mean.

No matter what the circumstances are, she is my family and I respect her even though she may not respect me for being gay but goddamnit, it’s my life.  Be grateful I’m happy and I’m not miserable in a relationship with a woman who I am not sexually attracted to with children who probably hate me for taking out my aggression on them for having to be stuck in that marriage just to please your homophobic ass.

That’s all I have to say. *Steps off of my soap box*

It’s Our 17 Year Anniversary

Today is our 17 year anniversary.  We met in 1994 and we just clicked and became a couple.  Most people count their wedding anniversary, not the day they became a couple but considering gays still can’t get married in California, I count our relationship years instead.  Even if we could get married, I would still count how long we’ve been together.

Ok so the cake doesn’t look great, I was running out of frosting, you know how those frosting containers only have so much and I think I put too much in some spots but not enough in others which is why there is a hole on the side in the front but it’s ok, at least I didn’t have to pay $20 for it from the grocery store.

The cake doesn’t symbolize anything really, I just wanted an excuse to have cake lol.  Obviously I had to photo shop the rainbow heart and 17 years because it was too plain for this post, I wish I had the talent to draw that onto the cake with colored frosting.

Well… to another 17 years.  Cheers!

Pray the Gay Away?

Thanks to the Oprah Winfrey Network (the new OWN channel) we have some new shows to watch on TV and Our America with Lisa Ling is among one of them that I am interested in watching.

Todays episode was “Pray the Gay Away?” along with a very special primetime episode of the new Gayle King Show where they discuss the episode, take calls and talk to participants from the documentary.

I think that every gay person has their own beliefs as to why there is homosexuality. My own partner of 17 years believes that he is gay because of his parents’ failed marriage when his father came back from the Korean War in the mid 50’s. His father came home mentally traumatized and their relationship ended and his father eventually passed away. He believes that the destruction of his parents marriage and subsequent death is what turned him gay. And he has every right to have his opinion whether I or anyone else disagrees with it.

I personally believe that I was born this way because I’ve always had an attractiveness towards the same-sex since I met a cute boy named Ruben when I was 4 years old. I had dreams about him and I just knew that I liked him. There was nothing out of the ordinary that made me choose to like him, I just did.

I mean, one could argue that I may have turned gay because of the abuse I endured throughout my childhood but I didn’t know any better. I thought it was normal for parents to beat their children and call them stupid and retarded and worthless among other names. I saw the way my aunt and uncle raised their 3 kids which was basically the same or worse so that there told me, it’s normal. My cousins were treated way worse than I was and they all turned out straight and so did my sister.

So in my case I just don’t believe that my being abused the same way as 4 other people had any impact on my sexuality because I was the only gay one.

I do have other cousins from a different aunt and uncle who treated their kids like human beings and 2 of them turned out lesbian after suffering no childhood trauma. So what does that tell you? They raised 5 kids and 2 of them turned out differently despite all of them being treated with the same love.

The argument that there is no evidence of a gay gene and that it’s all taught to you, you are born straight but you turn gay from your environment is all bullcrap to me. Maybe the gay gene isn’t meant to be found, maybe we’re chosen for this life for population control or who knows, maybe something else.

This Exodus group tells people that they can change and I feel it is wrong because the only person who can change you is you. If you are gay and you are just so unhappy about it and want to put in the effort to turn straight then go for it. Don’t expect for it to work because you will always be gay no matter what they tell you. But if you are in that much pain about it and you have the will power then fine. Do what you like, it’s your body. But don’t turn around and condemn those who refuse to live a lie for the rest of their existence.

This one woman (whose name escapes me) who is a pastor and says she was a lesbian for 14 or so years but then decided to be straight, she compares homosexuality with addiction to drugs or alcohol. I can’t even begin to think what Bullcrap that is because I’ve been gay for 40 years and celibate for the last 10. I am not going through withdrawals lol. I didn’t go through withdrawals 10 years ago, 5 years ago, 2 years ago, 1 year ago or today. I am completely withdrawal free and unfortunately still sex free but that was never my choice, it was the choice of my partner who has erectile dysfunction (he’s 21 years older than I am) so I have to respect that.

Of course being a born again Christian he tells people that he is abstaining from sex not because of his “ED” but because he is a “non-practicing homosexual” so the church won’t kick him out. And hey, if that’s what you have to do then that’s what you have to do. I have no ill feelings about him for any of that.

That only thing that pissed me off throughout the whole show was that ex-lesbian woman comparing sexuality to addiction. I think that I am living proof that it was never an issue of “I gotta have it” because I don’t gotta have anything. I can certainly abstain with the help of my old childhood friend Tom Thumb and his 4 brothers.

Look if you are a born again christian and you feel that being gay means you are going to hell for it and don’t want that then change yourself because that is what you want to do. Don’t let anyone fool you into thinking it’s wrong because it’s not wrong, it’s natural to want to live a happy life and for someone to tell you that you are sinning are themselves sinning for taking gods job away by acting as judge. There is a recession so let God do his job.

It’s 2011. When is racism and bigotry going to end? Is it going to be soon?

We all believe in what we all want to believe in and these opinions are what I believe in. Thank you for reading.

As for my relationship, our 17 year anniversary is in 2 1/2 weeks. Even I can’t believe it has been 17 years. I am with the person I was meant to be with whether sex is involved in the relationship or not. Sex doesn’t make a relationship, it is only a part of it and who says it even has to be any part of it after so many years? We love each other just the way we are, thin or fat, sick or healthy, till death do we part. In this life and the next as I feel I have found my true soul mate and no church can convince us otherwise.

Happy Valentine’s Day

Remember when you were a kid and your mom bought you a box of valentine’s day cards to write the names of each and every one of your classmates on then pass them out?  Isn’t it funny how the boys gave each other valentine’s day cards and all the girls gave each other cards?  Why is it that we did that, and it wasn’t by choice either, we were forced to do that.  The teacher would send everyone home with a seating chart so we knew exactly how many cards we needed and so we could write the names on each of the cards and envelopes.  We needed the names because even though we shared a classroom all day, we didn’t really know everyone in the class.

Do the schools still do that or are they so freaked out by homosexuality that they don’t do that anymore?

I was at Walgreens and I saw the Twilight valentine’s day cards and I just had to chuckle because when you think of giving valentines day cards, monsters are usually the last thing that you would want to associate with a holiday like this, or is it because they are vampires and werewolves in a love triangle that make it so special?

Well my childhood is long past, my relationship with Darrin has lasted 17 years and we are way past the valentine’s day spirit.  I think that is a holiday reserved for younger relationships but I’m sure there are women who would disagree with me.  We still give each other cards and candy but it just doesn’t mean that much to either one of us anymore.  It’s just another day for us.

And on that note, Happy Valentine’s day to you.  Don’t get too many cavities from all the sugar.

Taco Bell’s Meat

I heard something the other day on the news about some allegations that Taco Bell’s meat is 35% meat and they were saying something about the rest being soy or something.  I don’t remember exactly what they said but I don’t listen to any of that BS.

I’ve been eating Taco Bell my entire life and if it’s the same stuff that they’ve always had before then I know it’s not going to kill me.  If anything, I eat it so often that I have built an immunity to anything that might be in the meat lol.

Guess what we had for dinner tonight?

The Wall Street Journal posted this article today about it.  The meat isn’t 100% beef, it’s actually 88%, the rest is water and spices which gives it flavor.  Go ahead and read the article.

I worked at Taco Bell when I was 17 years old.  Although I didn’t make the beef I don’t really know what spices are in it or how it’s made but I do know how the refried beans are made because I was there early in the morning to blend the beans that were being pressure cooked all night long.  I also shredded the cheese and cut the tortillas into triangles for the cinnamon crispas which they don’t even sell anymore.  They eventually put me on the line so I was assembling the food but that’s as far as I went, I quit after a month and went to Wendy’s lol.

So whatever false information you hear online about Taco Bell’s meat, ignore it because it’s not true.

Tom’s of Maine

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Toms of Maine. All opinions are 100% mine.

I think I was 17 years old when I first discovered Tom’s Of Maine in the grocery store. I was already on my own at this time so I wasn’t expected to use the same product my mother always bought and I was curious about it so I bought it. I was actually pleasantly surprised that it had a very nice smell and taste and I’ve used it ever since.

I think my wicked fresh moment was when I realized I didn’t need to spray any chemicals in my mouth when I wanted to kiss someone because my breath was already fresh even hours after I had brushed my teeth. It’s not a very impressive wicked fresh moment so I’d like to hear about yours. Go to the That’s Wicked Fresh contest page and tweet your wicked fresh moment. You could win a $500 gift card for Target and other wicked fresh prizes so what are you waiting for?

Did you know that Tom’s of Maine is on and ? I’m following them because I like to hear when they have new products come out. They also tweet interesting facts about the earth since they are an eco-friendly product.  Plus they’ve been tweeting holiday recipes.  You should give them a like and a follow, it’s worth it.